:: Just To Keep Posting

Mmmm... a bowl of potatoes and a screen full of hockey. It'll work.
More food. Jimmy's Donair. So good. You burp garlic all day after having one.
Luis lets his Donair know how he feels in a not-so-subtle way.
Comfort food, really.
Luis lets me know how he feels about me... in a not-so-subtle way.
After cutting out four templates it becomes obvious what has been accidentally created. My artistic touch finishes what fate has started and Co-po is born. (Made of Coroplast templates for the corrugated impared)A set.


So here's a neat story. Does anyone remember my partner about 6 months ago? His name was Ben. Better known as Crackhead Ben. I don't think his name really needs explaining. I only worked with him for a month when the bosses found out and let him go. Besides being an addict he was also the best helper I had ever worked with because he was strong and smart and never gave me trouble. Well, he once crossed the line with me but was fired the next day so I didn't need to get involved.

The story gets better when a few weeks ago Calgary reported having a serial bank robber woman. She had taken 3 banks down in a week or two. And about a week after that was caught somehow. I didn't follow the story really but once the facts were all sorted out and it made the papers it turns out it was a woman and my Crackhead working together who were robbing banks! heheheh, oh Ben. What a guy.

Everyday ends
I am right on the edge, I
Don't know what comes next

:: Sunny, 72

So here's a few of the things I came out with.

"Cursive writing lost a lot of ground when it made the lowercase z a double line letter."

"Windbreakers are ridiculous.... there, I said it."

"When I'm high I dream of doing amazing things and being a hero."

"Because I have to, I'll live."

"Girls riding bikes are sooo hot."

And a bunch of things I noticed that don't really mean much, except at the time.

:: Positive

This happened twice today.
Then it cleared up.







Oh, Calgary... *swoon*

:: Negative

What a week, what a week. Here's a quick rundown of what has been on my mind, constantly, since Monday. Best to start at the beggining...


They hired a new guy at work to be an installer. Commercial glass experience. About 35 I'd say. I think he told me but I forget. I get to work with him on his first day... 2 weeks ago. Here's the best part. Barely speaks english.

So whatever. I'm a big boy and the Calgary job market forces you to take what you can get. Having expeirence is a great bonus. I figure at least he can handle glass so I should be safe. Not true. By 10 in the morning I was lucky to still have blood in my body. The man handles glass like a cotton sweater. Luck prevailed and a mirror that should have broke and seriously wounded one of us was installed with minimal damage. This house probably goes for a mil or two but he didn't mind scratching everything he got near. And he was so fucking eager to work that it takes more work to make sure he's not fucking something up than to do the work alone.

When working with glass knowing your partner and communication are essential. I couldn't tell him to slow down. I couldn't plan the lift with him. Before the end of the day I've told the shop he shouldn't be working with us.

Blah blah, the next week he works with the boss so he can train him and see him work. I make it clear I don't ever want to work with him again and we should fire him. This week he's back with me. I don't like it but I'll try.

By 9 in the am I am totally fried. Out of patience. We're lucky we didn't break everything we installed. Absolutely in a rage. Thinking of hurting him, or myself, or anyone else. Furious. I want to smash everything I touch. At the end of the day I go straight to my bosses and make it clear I don't think he can work at house of mirrors and that I'm certain I can't work with him without wanting to drive into oncoming traffic so my day will end. He can see me shaking with rage. I put on my smile, paper thin.

He talks me into trying another day.

Tuesday. Not good.

Rage. I realize that I have a problem with rage. I am not just angry. I am enraged. I want to kill. I think it is the most logical solution and, therefore, would be easy. I can't stop thinking about it. A Kane mind at full speed. Jaws clenching constantly. Forgetting to breathe or look where I'm driving. And seriously not caring. Telus got me here once. They call this a "language barrier".

I tell the bossman again. Standing, shaking, arms crossed. Very clearly. He says to have a pint and try my best. I'm rage. I am rage. Putting my head through the walls makes sense.

Wednesday we work together again. I accomplish very little and leave as soon as I'm done. By now it is a personal insult to me that I have to even suffer these emotions. It both exhausts and invigorates me. I want to quit if this continues.

So the obvious solution is to take a day off and so I call in sick. Drinking enough the night before so that I am actually unable to work the next day seals the deal and my excuse valid.

In closing, I was, and still am, quite rageful. It's so strong. I could do anything because I would lose everything. Nothing less than full satisfaction will do.

I'm getting better and will be ok after the weekend. Boy, though.... like really really mad. grrrrfuckingowwwlll.

:: Room

Room update. It is now clean and organized. Cozy.
Is my bed as comfortable as it looks? Yes. Yes it is.
If you could have seen my desk 1 week ago this picture would make you laugh.... looking back I should have taken a picture of my old desk. So you could laugh. *sigh

:: Moving Up

A pile of my stuff. This is most of what I own excluding some furniture.
Moving isn't easy, though. And March was a rough month for me. I broke/smashed my toe and that was just the beginning. Cuts and scrapes, bumps and bruises...
I was cleaning a glass when the cup broke and dug deeply into the side of my knuckle. This cut can be pinched and opened up and you can see the inside of my hand. Not that painful but boy did it bleed.
Because I wasn't going to take time off for such a silly cut I had to go get it stitched up so it would stop opening up and bleeding all over.
There was some spillage during the stitching. Doc was very nice to me.

So now of course I had to move after work with a busted up hand... meh. Wasn't that bad actually. Stitches are genius. My room has taken the worst hit and is about half the size of the master bedroom but it's all I need. Once it's cleaned up it'll be swell.
So we get to the best parts. The new place. Other than my room pretty much everything is setup and looking great.
This is the living room and that gentleman in the chair is my new roommate, Tim Lynch.
Time Lynch glows like an angel.
Tim's awesome. Chill cat, doesn't lose his cool. He used to be a part owner of House Of Mirrors. Glass dog of old.
So we get to the balcony. Great size and our place faces due west. Hello mountain sunsets. Fuck yeah. Red bike won't be able to stay here but he can while it's dry. I built that bbq yesterday then cooked some salmon on it. mmmm. bbq.
A quick shot from the balcony. I love balconies. Balcony balcony balcony.




One of many.
Here are a few nice pics I caught on a ride the other day.



So far, utterly amazing. Things were getting worse everyday with my mental state and they didn't need to be. I have once again, and this time much quicker, realized my living situation wasn't working and found one that would. I didn't want to leave my previous apartment as living with big E and Macattack were great times. Unfortunately the price and stability of Fairview were too hard to manage. This place is about 100sqr ft bigger and a couple hundred bucks less.

What does it all mean? I can become happy again. Happy to work, happy to be home. And the controls are back in my own hands. I will be getting my motor bike soon and have an underground parking area to keep it.

The big things are in order. It's just a matter of seeing some sets and getting my thoughts back in order.


Everyday ends
Every ride ends as well
Ride everyday